Disclaimer and Caution Notice

Adult language is used in this Blog.
Here's a bunch more stuff that absolves me of all kinds of bad things ..................

Nothing in this or any other post on this blog shall be construed in any way, shape or form as legal advice, technical advice, relationship advice or any other form of advice or hints or any shit like that whatsoever. The author of this blog reserves the unlimited right to point and laugh at anybody who does or says anything because of what was written in this blog. This blog does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my former or any future employer, my first wife, my late wife, my future wife, my mother, my siblings, my friends (real and otherwise); don't quote me on this; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything; all rights reserved; you may distribute this content freely but you may not make a profit from it, at least not unless you PayPal my fair share to me; terms are subject to change without notice; illustrations are slightly enlarged to show detail, or shrunk to hide detail; accept no substitutes; any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental; do not remove this disclaimer under penalty of law; hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle; your mileage may vary; no substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; objects in mirror are closer than they appear; this article is void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; caveat emptor; this blog is provided "as is" without any warranties whatsoever; reader assumes full responsibility; an equal opportunity article; no shoes, no shirt, no service; quantities are limited while supplies last; use no slugs; if any defects are discovered, do not attempt to read them yourself, but return to an authorized service center; read at your own risk; parental discretion advised, text may contain explicit materials some readers may find objectionable; keep away from sunlight; keep away from OJ; keep away from pets and small children; limit one-per-family please; no money down; no purchase necessary; you need not be present to win; remove cardboard tube before vaginal insertion; some assembly required; batteries not included; instructions are included but may not be in a language you are comfortable with; action figures sold separately; no preservatives added; slippery when wet; safety goggles may be required during use; sealed for your protection, do not read if safety seal is broken; not liable for damages arising from use, abuse or misuse; close cover before striking; for external use only; if rash, irritation, redness, or swelling develops, discontinue reading; read only with proper ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool, dry place; keep away from open flames; beware of jet blast; avoid contact with eyes and skin and avoid inhaling fumes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store above 120 degrees Fahrenheit; do not place near a flammable or magnetic source; smoking this blog could be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of a proper protection; see your dentist regularly; no salt, MSG, artificial color or flavoring added; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult a physician; articles are ribbed for your pleasure; possible penalties for early withdrawal; offer valid only at participating sites; allow four to six weeks for delivery; must be 18 or over to read; disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes, and other Acts of God, neglect, damage from improper reading, incorrect line voltage, improper or unauthorized reading, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, customer adjustments that are not covered in this list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, rocket explosion, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, mud slides, forest fire, or projectile (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, shot, BB's, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.); other restrictions may apply. 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1 comment:

  1. Do not ride bicycle after dark. Coffee is hot.